Okay, so I awoke this morning and fully expected to be an internet sensation. To my extreme disappointment I am not yet. I understand that these things take time and I just have to be patient.
My "whatever" and I have taken the next step or rather I have taken our relationship to the next level. For over a year now we have been in this awkward limbo purgatory of a relationship state that doesn't fully exist yet we have all these strange understood and not spoken rules. So today I decided that I am in a relationship. I let him know of our now elevated status. I told my "whatever" that I am now calling him my boyfriend and if anyone ask him whether or not he is my boyfriend the answer to that question is yes. To someone reading this you probably think I am desperate or stupid. I am probably a little of both but I have good reasoning. I believe that if I keep calling him my boyfriend (with his knowledge) that he will forget he isn't "really" my boyfriend or that this wasn't his brilliant idea and he will just think he is my boyfriend.
Now to what I really wanted to talk about: Water
Stay with me on this.
How weird is the concept of Water? Really. Below is a list I complied today at my job (that I make no money at)
1. You Drink It
2. You take a bath in something you drink
3. You play in it
4. Fish and other marine life go to the bathroom in it
5. Humans go to the bathroom in it and THEN you continue playing in it
6. Your sweat is 99 percent water
7. Your tears are whatever percent water (I tried to Google this)
8. You can eat it (ice, snow)
9. You put it into other drinks
10. If you got something in your eye you flush it out with water
11. It comes out of the sky
12. It comes out of the ground
13. You spit it
14. I am sure there are more things that I can't think of
What else do you do all this with? I mean can you imagine how weird it would be to bathe in Sweet Tea? (water is used to make this too!)
I think it is weird. I understand you may not but wow. Really.
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So, this is my first blog I have ever read and appropriately it is my sister's. I'm not really sure what blogs are suppose to talk about, or the correct way of going about commenting on them, but here it goes anyway. I have decided to help you on your quest for fame and fortune, seeing how the universe denied us of becoming princesses, or at least heiresses. I guess we will have to gain our fortune on our own, since your job is leaving you in an economic stupor, and I am destined to remain a starving artist.
ReplyDeleteNumber one: (or your #15). 71% of the Earth's surface is covered with water, but 97% of it is salt water. There are 326000000000000000000 gallons of water (326 million trillion gallons)and 6,895,892,756 people... so water seems to have the upper hand on us.
Number two: What I really want to talk about... your Mr."whatever"/your self-proclaimed boyfriend or whom I have so affectionately named "your Brett Favre". This nickname is derived from his inability to make a decision and lack of commitment, and my overall annoyance with the guy. And no, you are not desperate or stupid, many have been lured in by a man, even men that believe they are burly lumberjacks during their identity crisis. Thankfully, Mr.'whatever' shaved. But anyhow, have faith. Favre will one day stay retired and finally make up his mind (hopefully)!
Number three: Make sure Cooper doesn't pee on me again the next time I see him.